Episode Date July 15, 2021
Featured Guest Julie Lythcott-Haims
Featured Book "Educated" by Tara Westover

Episode Summary

Julie Lythcott-Haims reading from Tara Westover’s Educated and discussing the emotional suffering that follows shame and following the crowd to fit in.

Have I ever been embarrassed by some of the things I’ve done in the past? Endlessly. Have I ever been ashamed of things I’ve done? I have. But have I ever felt ashamed of myself on the basis of being me? Have I felt ashamed of myself for not fitting in because of some ‘unlucky’ so-called roll of the DNA dice? No, I have not. It turns out, this is privilege. Julie Lythcott-Haims, speaker, activist and author of “Your Turn: How to be an Adult”, shares her experience growing up and living as a black and biracial woman and the struggle she faced in managing shame, and between conformity and being herself.

Julie reads two pages from ‘Educated’ by Tara Westover. [reading begins at 11:18]

Hear us talk about:

  • Julie’s experience of finding her identity and how she harnessed this experience: ‘We must unburden ourselves from the shame installed in us by the opinions of others.’ [20:40]
  • How to stop seeking conformity and living to please others. [22:47]
  • How to find your own voice: ‘Our doubtful feelings are just as much substantial proof of us being miserable as our bodies breaking down from stress.’ [27:52]
  • Differentiating which challenges make you stronger and which ones will make you miserable. [33:02]
  • What it means to be an activist. [36:21]
  • Moving from fear to love – What keeps us stuck in fear? [39:06]

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RESOURCES:

Julie Lythcott-Haims | Website | Twitter | LinkedIn | Instagram

Julie’s book: Your Turn: How to Be an Adult

Tara Westover | Educated

Follow Michael on | Instagram | Twitter | YouTubeLinkedIn | Facebook

Michael Bungay Stanier

Michael Bungay Stanier

I'm the author of five books that have collectively sold more than a million copies. I'm the founder of Box of Crayons, a learning and development company that helps organizations move from advice-driven to curiosity-led. I'm the host of the *2 Pages with MBS* podcast.

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